Lisa has a hard time at my shows. Last night we had a talk about this.
The songs I sing are not well-rounded pictures of situations. They are photographs of moments in time blown out to 2-5 minutes. None of my songs give people a well-rounded concept about anything. They are emotional and reactive and beautiful snapshots.
Unfortunately, when I sing about a snapshot in time that I experienced with another person many years ago, it is easy for people to get the idea that those snapshots represent the whole of relationships. This is not the case.
When I sing about people who hold or have formerly held prominent roles in my life, it does not do justice to the complexity of those relationships.
Since Lisa and I rarely talk about past relationships, those 2-5 minute songs are all she has to work from. It makes sense that she might increase the magnifying glass and turn them into her reality of those relationships, filling in all gaps with the contents of my songs. But the fact is most of my relationships are scarily ordinary. I regularly experience and have experienced moments of brilliance with friends, current and past. But for the most part, nothing exceptional happens 99% of the time.
My music is the audio representation of 1% of my exceptional waking hours.
So, while 1% of the time I spent with former girlfriends and friends was exceptional, 99% of it was pretty unexceptional.
I would argue that 2-5% of my time with Lisa is exceptional, which is pretty exciting stuff for me! The fact that I have only a handful of songs that reference Lisa and our experiences together is merely a factor of time and my lack of recent musical production. Rest assured, they are coming.
I have songs in the works about cats, marriage, love, and family that Lisa has played a significant role in crafting. Unfortunately, until they are finalized, my band will continue playing songs from past albums. I love them and will probably always love them, but it is time to move on.
Over the past year or so, you have probably noticed that my band has been focusing on our more abstract songs and less on songs that call out former girlfriends directly. This is a result of me attempting to bring Lisa into the fold. I would do more if I could, but we are working from relatively finite resources here – 2 LPs + a number of odds and ends. We are also continually rounding out our collection of songs that we cover, the expansion of which is partially owing to my desire to bring Lisa closer to the Cryns #3 community.
I will continue to talk with Lisa about things I can do to make my music more accessible to her. I desperately want her to sing along with the rest of you, even though she is shy about singing out loud. I know she’s got a beautiful singing voice buried underneath that shyness.